Coping With A Loss

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Reactions to Grief

There are many emotions that grieving people experience. Some may be strange, unwelcome, or may make you feel as if you're going crazy.

Emotions can include:

• numbness and lack of feeling;

• shock and disbelief;

• yearning for the person who died -- searching for or expecting the person to return;

• panic, anxiety, tenseness;

• anger and guilt -- even at the person for dying or at yourself for not having done enough.

• sadness, depression, hopelessness, despair;

• helplessness, dependency, vulnerability;

• not caring about yourself;

• irritability;

• sense of relief when the person dies after a period of illness, followed by guilt;

• loss of liveliness and spontaneity;

• isolation.

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In addition to these various emotional reactions, people tend to experience changes in their mental and physical conditions.

Common mental changes include:

• sense of unreality;

• confusion;

• difficulty concentrating;

• difficulty making decisions;

• preoccupation with the person who died and obsessively reviewing the dying process;

• thinking about suicide;

• humorlessness;

• sense of being unconnected, of being "in your own world."

  The physical effects people can experience include:

• sleep problems;

• loss or change of appetite;

• fatigue, lack of energy;

• restlessness;

• stomach distress;

• heightened sensitivity to pain;

• headaches;

• crying, tearfulness;

• weight gain/loss;

• increase/decrease in sexual desire or energy.

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