HIV POSITIVE  Caretakers
Coping With A Loss

What Lies Ahead

When grieving a recent loss, many people need to feel understanding and support. When someone tells you to have hope and to look forward to an end of grief, you may think your feelings are being discounted. At some point, though, you will I be ready to feel hopeful. Moving through the tasks of grieving - struggling to accept the reality of the loss; expressing feelings of loss, sadness and anger - are necessary steps for most people to resolve their loss and enter into a new phase of their lives. Even while grieving, you can look forward to a time when there is less pain and a growing sense of getting on with rife. You can have hope and believe that there is more ahead in life for you than the crushing emptiness and sadness you feel with loss. This is not to say you can ever replace the person who died, end all sadness, or live as if the death never occurred that's not possible. But to feel whole and alive again, to enjoy memories once more, and to embrace life anew: These are real and reachable goals.

"Sometimes I just wanted to be done with the past, move on fast, but I found I wasn't ready. Something would go wrong in a new relationship, and Id be thrown into confusion and despair, and deep pain about my loss again. But I stuck with it, letting myself grieve, have feelings and all, and I started to move through it and notice changes. My 'deep grieving' happens just once in awhile now, not every day like before, and I smile more at my memories."

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